Do men know...

[KFCSpicy]

How to become friends first before the act of getting seriously involved in a relationship with a significant other?

I mean, most men just meet yuh, take yuh out and assume that it's a done deal with you and them and that you are exclusive to them and them only. Is this the churlishness of genetics or is this some how communicated in error or deliberately by the woman involved?

When is a date just a date? When is here is my email address/phone number just another way for us to get further acquainted and not your licence to own me?

Discuss please.

[Scorpio]

K, this is not a simple thing, yuh kno.

Firstly, you're not talking about a guy who is genuinely interested in a girl, but rather a guy whose interest is getting her in the sack.

I have some questions about the rules of the friends first approach :

(1) How do you take a relationship from friendship to lovers - who makes the first move ?
(2) If you have the "let's just be friends talk" how long does that remain in effect ?
(3) While you're friends, is the guy allowed to date other girls ?
(4) Is the girl allowed to date other guys ?
(5) While you're friends, does the guy have to listen to you moan about guys & past relationships ?
(6) Is the guy allowed to look at other girls when you're out on a friend date ?

[sheppy]

Let's look at the shoe on the other foot.

If you go out with a guy and you think its 'just a date' and you see him out with another chick at a party or dinner/ lunch etc... do you feel betrayed?
You think he's a player? You still go out with him another time after this discovery? do you confront him about it?


I think there is usually something said between people when they intend to see each other exculsively, yet there may be certain expectations leading up to that moment...and even if nothing is said...you go to lunch everyday..go out on weekends and start engaging in some intimate activity (not necessarily sex) you can almost assume that things are getting 'real' ....

fact is, only way to be sure is to ask...or to say...communication people...why is it so hard?

[lexbarker]

As a man I will tell you one thing. Men (generally) dream (literally and imaginary) and think about sex all the time.
This is a good starting point when looking and analysing the human male.

[Mkris7]

I am a Man and while I do not consider myself the typical guy, I will "out " most men by saying that "If you give a man an inch he will take a mile"

Women need to take responsibility and set the pace in this race. yeah, yeah, I know, what about the guys responsibilities? Most men don't grow up, there toys just get more
expensive so please Ladies, take the driver seat on this one.

My daughter is now dating and to prepare her, when she was young we used to have a "Daddy/Daughter date every Wednesday. I would take her out to dinner, bring her flowers,
get her door and chair for her and just have a great evening of laughter and fun. As she got older, we also included converstations regarding the qualities of a good man and how she should expect to be treated. These experiences shaped how she views a man now and I am proud to say, she does not waste her time with anyone who won't bring his best to the table with her. And she would never expect a boy to call her home without him first meeting B.I. G. Big POPPA Baaaybeee! LOL :D

And heres's a little secret, while most guys will never turn down the Pum Pum; all good men who really love a woman will wait to she is ready....and when he looks back at it, he will respect her even more. Don't allow yourself to be taken for granted, let boys come at you like the Princes that you all are with dignity and respect.

Ladies, May GOD continue to be your guide and protection---all the answers are in the book.

Mkris7

[dhal]

so basically, yuh need to have standards. and u have to stick to them.

[KFCSpicy]

That's all great...but that does not mean that is the way for all to go. Your standards are not mine does not mean they are any less worthy or important and vice versa. So one man taught his daughter what his views are and molded her thinking to suit. She will be rewarded in the end hopefully by choosing a great man. But what about those women/young ladies out there that never had daddy daughter day?

Essentially all women are the instinct about men most ignore them for whatever reasons at the time. Ithink people need to stop lecturing and show by example. That includes both men and women alike. I am responsible for me and you and the kids too whether they be mine or not...yuh get meh? I used to teach and there was soooo many things I thought I could have effected and change but as a wise person once said to me Yuh make them yuh doh make their minds, also once u teach them all they may need to know at home everyday they walk out that door to go mingle with the world they unlearn it all. So teaching is never ending process.

I think allowing someone to think for themselves is mandatory because I doh want went things go wrong and they tend to...that the person cannot find blame within themselves but tend to pass that blame on. I want leaders not followers for kids but I also want what's best too.

[lexbarker]

so basically, yuh need to have standards. and u have to stick to them.
I used to have one with too much standards. I had to open car door for her in front of my friends and that was really destroying my male macho image. So I had to quit that scene.

[KFCSpicy]

so basically, yuh need to have standards. and u have to stick to them.
I used to have one with too much standards. I had to open car door for her in front of my friends and that was really destroying my male macho image. So I had to quit that scene.

No such things as too much standards hun. You were the one with the ego problem, apparently what your friends thought made more sense to you than having a woman with standards and class. :roll:

[sapodila]

MKris7........Proud pappa.........tell them like it is. Respect your self first then all men will respect yuh too. Good job Pops!

[KFCSpicy]

MKris7........Proud pappa.........tell them like it is. Respect your self first then all men will respect yuh too. Good job Pops!

Ummmm like Sapodilla skip the post where the other man on here said he dumped the woman cause she had too much standards? So I guess yuh statement is not universal in it's acceptance Sapodilla.
:roll:

[punjabtrini]

Interestingly, those standards do not kick in until later!
We are assuming both parties are logical but when it some down to instinct, standarsd go out the door. Good you are entraining standards! Better now than later.

[lexbarker]

so basically, yuh need to have standards. and u have to stick to them.
I used to have one with too much standards. I had to open car door for her in front of my friends and that was really destroying my male macho image. So I had to quit that scene.

No such things as too much standards hun. You were the one with the ego problem, apparently what your friends thought made more sense to you than having a woman with standards and class. :roll:
I have not seeen her for quite a while but as far as I know (from friends and family) she has not met the man to accommodate her standards as yet.

[KFCSpicy]

I am a female, and I am very close to my dad meaning I can discuss anything under the sun with him. He still does not know half of what I do or get up to. Plus I always had a policy. Yuh eh meeting meh father or mooma if I am not serious about u.

[KFCSpicy]

I think that men are genetically made up so they cyah be yuh friend and yuh lover too. :? Or is it just the types I does meet? :evil:

[Scorpio]

^^^steups

[KFCSpicy]

haul yuh one eyed tail :D

[cocoa]

I firmly believe that we all get what we deserve, so upon realization of this it would be in sync to take the chance or not. :D

[KFCSpicy]

^^^ eh? :?

[guyguy]

Gyul, in dis day an age, time so precious it eh have time fuh "fren fuss, lover later" nah. Once yuh make de team and yuh get op tuh de crease, iz only six yuh lookin tuh hit wit de fuss ball oui.

[KFCSpicy]

ewwwwwwww@ guy just ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww :shock:

[Silky]

men lie! :evil:

[dancerboy]

SURE. My wife and i were friends for more than a year.We met at a birthday party. And the transition was very smooth, she was seing someone and so was I. Her relation didn't work out. I realized she is a very warm and charming person. VERY DIFERRENT FROM THE WOMAN I WAS SEEING. SHE HAS NOT YET PROVEN ME WRONG AFTER 13 YEARS OF MARRIAGE. IT WAS ALMOST LIKE BEING SHIPWRECKED ON AN ISLAND WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX. YOU LOOK AT EACH OTHER AND ASK 'WHY CAN'T WE BE TOGETHER ? DANCERBOY

[SSDD]

good question kfc some men does just jump right in and that it... sometimes they dont even ask the woman if she want to be in a relationship with him. i met one like that and he was oh so heartbroken when i told him that i didnt want a relationship with him... and he reached all the way to having child and thingin his mind eh.
my current bf and i were friends for a few months before we took the other step.

lexbarker that girl you spoke about it was only with your friends she insisted this be done or all the time?
for me if the guy does it it's appreciated but the way i walk etc is a matter of if he reach before :lol: i just don't study it . if we in a car when we reach our destination i not sitting in the car and waiting for him to turn of the car walkall the way around and then open door me i consider that wasting time. if i pulling on shoe, fixing hair etc and he come around while i doing that to open the door cool

[Jenny]

My bf and I were friends for 4 yrs before we started going out. 3 yrs down the line and things going just as good as it was on the first date....

Can't say the same for my last bf....the cheating SOB! He use to lecture the 1st years at uni and happened to read an email over his shoulder once with one of his students saying 'thanks for meeting for coffee the other day'.........so I say 'I didnt know you met your students socially?' He say yea, he helped her out and she invited him for coffee'....so I say how come you eh tell me....he said that I will get vex! Well the SOB was right...I asked to see another email from her and realised he seen her more than once, then I pelt him with the TV remote, buss he head an send him home!

[KFCSpicy]

brahhhhhahananananahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahha ha

Jenny yuh good that make meh laff today. :D :D :D

[Jenny]

I shoulda pelt him with ah rollin pin if I had one!!!

[KFCSpicy]

yuh needed to stone he tail...that is what a true trini wuddah do. :twisted:

[Scorpio]

Hum, talk about a man bashing thread.... now they givin each other advice on how to LITERALLY bash dey man. :?

[KFCSpicy]

Stuepse shut it three legged heffa Scorps! :x

Jenny girl years ago i had one that broke up wid me and denied he was wid de underaged girl but she dey sleeping over and on he lap on de taxi stand. :roll: Girl one night i coming home from cinema he in tong laughing loud loud wid he friends on de taxi stand and making me feel reall small...I jess hold meh head up and tek meh taxi and went home.

As soon as I got home i change into all black and stuff meh hair into a black hat and went down de road by he house. With luck he was already home and parked up. Girl ah padlocked he tail into dat house and scratch down de car and out de tyres.

He come de next morning after he neighbour let him out de house and telling my father on me :shock: I deny it down to de ground but i did already tell my daddy what i did so let he rock so, meh faddah say stop wasting mey time wid dis b.s. and stay away from meh picknee fuh meh please before ah have to put meh hand in iniquity for yuh eh! and then meh faddah tell him how he see me home so it cuddnah be me.

:D

Mind u it was not he car he did borrow it from a pardnah...de same pardnah meet me some weeks later trying to be aggressive i jess steupse and walk off while some men holding him back from cuffing meh up in meh head :lol:

Man need some big stone in they groin dread.

[Jenny]

Girl I say you do good....If I was braver I woulda do worse....heh It was good yuh dad stood up for you too!

I am never a person to get that emotional, but it was the strangest feeling to feel that much disgust and hate for another person..... You live an learn eh...now I know!

[Scorpio]

:shock: why did I come back to this thread ??? :? :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

[Ali]

:shock: why did I come back to this thread ??? :? :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

boi it have some funny storries :lol:

[vaio]

:lol: men shld start a women bashing thread.. lol

[Scorpio]

Ali, yeh ent see dem talkng about pelting man with stone and all kinda thing or what ? What funny about that ? But Vaio right we should start a woman bashing thread for trute....

......wait nuh, I really come back in this thread again... :? :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

[sapodila]

Oh ah forget bout dis thread.....K

Okay Lexbarker........nothing wrong wid 'getting' the door for de woman or pulling out she chair in front yuh frens eh.....teach dem how it's done. BOYS dees days lack etiquette. Never feel embarrassed for doing the gentlemanly ting. I know one day I go be a PROUD lady fuh teaching the YOUNGMAN how to treat his lady with respect and dignity and practice etiquette like a true GENTLEMAN.

[KFCSpicy]

STart a woman bashing thread lemmeh stalk it and stone it all yuh go see. :(

[Scorpio]

^^ oh gorm, ah fraid now.... :D

...why ah come in here again for boy... :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

[KFCSpicy]

cause yuh like de bakkanal :D

[Scorpio]

But k seriously, yuh ent think that maybe, just maybe the reason why some ah allyuh girls does have these bad experiences with men that does turn all ah allyuh into men haters by de ripe ole age of 25 is because ....

Allyuh like all dem players...de more bling and play they have de more allyuh does like dem..if allyuh know they have 3 odder woman, allyuh want to be dey #1 woman, just to feel allyuh better looking than de other 3

.....and, meanwhile, de fellas who genuine, down to earth and humble...de ones who just looking for one woman to put up on a pedestal and love for de rest ah he life....allyuh women find he ent good enough....wouldn't give him de time ah day !!!!!

Look, doh jump on meh case eh, I just thinking out loud, ah mustbe wrong as hell...but anyway....

....why ah keep coming back in here boy ... :? :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

[KFCSpicy]

:evil:

:evil:

So all women who hate men is women who initially was running down a man wid bling and car and numpteen woman? So it cyah be solely that they were taken in by some lying, no good, cyah brush, no money having, charming loser? Yuh feel is only certain men that does hurt women? Yuh smoke joe chewing gum ah wah scorps? Or yuh is a die hard fan of steretypes that were created to make weak men look strong?

Men from all walks of life, whether they bright, ugly, dohtish, rich, poor, wukking, goodlooking as hell, cud brush or cyah brush have one eye or two and 7 teeth does hurt at least one woman in their lives. Men arent evil cause dey does wear bling (what kinda childish crap is that?) men are evil towards women because it's either their nature, or they choose to be to that one particular woman at that point in both their lives.

Doctor or DVD seller all man equally have the choice to be a great man or a frocked up so and so.

So doh get meh hot here...just remember ah know where yuh living eh :evil: LP 25 Sea Lots :mrgreen:

[Scorpio]

:evil:

:evil:

So all women who hate men is women who initially was running down a man wid bling and car and numpteen woman? YES - hatred of men is usually the result of opening yuh legs for the wrong man for de wrong reason, de man of course getting exactly what he want untl he feel for a change and move on
So it cyah be solely that they were taken in by some lying, no good, cyah brush, no money having, charming loser? so if dde man was all these things, why de woman liked him to begin with - clearly for the wrong reasons !!!
Yuh feel is only certain men that does hurt women? Yuh smoke joe chewing gum ah wah scorps? Or yuh is a die hard fan of steretypes K, there usually is something to SOME sterotypes you know (not all eh)

that were created to make weak men look strong? What is a wweak man and what is a strong man, k....here is where sterotypes come in again...let meh hear yuh

Men from all walks of life, whether they bright, ugly, dohtish, rich, poor, wukking, goodlooking as hell, cud brush or cyah brush have one eye or two and 7 teeth does hurt at least one woman in their lives.again, if these men are all these bad things, why did the woman put herself in a position to be hurt ? Bling perhaps ?
Men arent evil cause dey does wear bling I never said they were
(what kinda childish crap is that?) men are evil towards women because it's either their nature,NOW THAT IS CHILDISH, K
or they choose to be to that one particular woman at that point in both their lives.

Doctor or DVD seller all man equally have the choice to be a great man or a frocked up so and so. This has nothing to do with professions, K - but interesting that you brought that into the equation

So doh get meh hot here. :D :D :D
..just remember ah know where yuh living ehoh, oh..dais true.... :evil: LP 25 Sea Lots :mrgreen:

[Silky]

some men are jus evil and big f-ing liars!

[KFCSpicy]

dey darn evil ah eh backing down man :x

and i outside yuh board house wid de satalite dish Scorps is me pelting stone on yuh galvanise roof eh :twisted:

[guyguy]

dey darn evil ah eh backing down man :x

and i outside yuh board house wid de satalite dish Scorps is me pelting stone on yuh galvanise roof eh :twisted:
Wait nah. Ah tort yuh say day yuh love meh? So, dat mean dat if men evil, an yuh love me, yuh love evil men? Ah soooo cornfuze .... meh foot tie op now.

[KFCSpicy]

doo doo is not uuuuu ah did mean. not all men evil just Scorps and one or two ah million :?
:D

I doh believe all men evil I believe men make mistakes just like us women and some just doh care who dey hurt.

[Scorpio]

But K, you are arguing from emotions...slice and dice de issue nah. :D

[dancerboy]

LADIES, SOME WOMEN TREAT ALL MEN LIKE DOGS. EVEN WHEN THEY MEET A DECENT MAN THEY TREAT HIM LIKE A DOG. AND WHEN HE STARTS TO BARK, THEY SAY YOU SEE HE IS JUST ANOTHER 'DWAG'. IT'S ALMOST A SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
DANCERBOY

[dancerboy]

I pelt him with the TV remote, buss he head an send him home!
My bf and I were friends for 4 yrs before we started going out. 3 yrs down the line and things going just as good as it was on the first date....

Can't say the same for my last bf....the cheating SOB! He use to lecture the 1st years at uni and happened to read an email over his shoulder once with one of his students saying 'thanks for meeting for coffee the other day'.........so I say 'I didnt know you met your students socially?' He say yea, he helped her out and she invited him for coffee'....so I say how come you eh tell me....he said that I will get vex! Well the SOB was right...I asked to see another email from her and realised he seen her more than once, then I pelt him with the TV remote, buss he head an send him home!
YOU HAD A 'SORF MAN' , AH TV REMOTE BUSS HE HEAD. U DAMN RIGHT TO SEND HIM PACKING. WOMEN DOH LIKE 'SORF MAN'.

DANCERBOY

[Scorpio]

LADIES, SOME WOMEN TREAT ALL MEN LIKE DOGS. EVEN WHEN THEY MEET A DECENT MAN THEY TREAT HIM LIKE A DOG. AND WHEN HE STARTS TO BARK, THEY SAY YOU SEE HE IS JUST ANOTHER 'DWAG'. IT'S ALMOST A SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
DANCERBOY


Dancer, now you getting to the real problem, thank you....

Women simply do not know how to treat decent men....

...why I back in this tread again for boy.... :? :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

[vaio]

Women simply do not know how to treat decent men....

...why I back in this tread again for boy.... :? :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

wrong.....some women may ill treat decent men....and the same goes for some men....ill treating decent women :geek:

[Scorpio]

Women simply do not know how to treat decent men....

...why I back in this tread again for boy.... :? :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: :arrow:

wrong.....some women may ill treat decent men....and the same goes for some men....ill treating decent women :geek:


Vaio, actually, after I posted that i realised I should not have made the comment so generalised...however the point remains (not de target, eh the point)...decent people (men or women) are more likely to be ill treated by the opposite sex becase they are taken advantage of. ;)

[vaio]

^^unless scorpie...a decent man...finds a decent woman....there is no ill treatment.... :D

[Scorpio]

Exactly, Vaio, you are brilliant !!!!

[KFCSpicy]

:roll: wow such deductive reasoning.

It eh have nothing to do with decency most times. Sometimes good people end up hurting other good people unintentionally too. It's simply that when we get ourselves involved we find it the hardest thing to get out of. For the women that tried to leave some get killed, for the men that tried to leave they get ostracised by friends and family members.

If you are no longer in love the obvious and right thing to do is just walk away not so? But most people can't or wont take that route as it is too hard to do. Some men hate weak women and then they will find one date them and treat them bard cause de same woman allowing them to do so, but that still not right either and vice versa.

[vaio]

:roll: wow such deductive reasoning.

It eh have nothing to do with decency most times. Sometimes good people end up hurting other good people unintentionally too. It's simply that when we get ourselves involved we find it the hardest thing to get out of. For the women that tried to leave some get killed, for the men that tried to leave they get ostracised by friends and family members.

If you are no longer in love the obvious and right thing to do is just walk away not so? But most people can't or wont take that route as it is too hard to do. Some men hate weak women and then they will find one date them and treat them bard cause de same woman allowing them to do so, but that still not right either and vice versa.

It is hard to get out of because we get into what is called the comfort zone.....we don't like change...even if the present situation is not desirable....we stay because we too damn lazy to get out of it...

[vaio]

Exactly, Vaio, you are brilliant !!!!

i know....thanx.. ;)

[deathwinger]

I am a Man and while I do not consider myself the typical guy, I will "out " most men by saying that "If you give a man an inch he will take a mile"

Women need to take responsibility and set the pace in this race. yeah, yeah, I know, what about the guys responsibilities? Most men don't grow up, there toys just get more
expensive so please Ladies, take the driver seat on this one.

My daughter is now dating and to prepare her, when she was young we used to have a "Daddy/Daughter date every Wednesday. I would take her out to dinner, bring her flowers,
get her door and chair for her and just have a great evening of laughter and fun. As she got older, we also included converstations regarding the qualities of a good man and how she should expect to be treated. These experiences shaped how she views a man now and I am proud to say, she does not waste her time with anyone who won't bring his best to the table with her. And she would never expect a boy to call her home without him first meeting B.I. G. Big POPPA Baaaybeee! LOL :D

And heres's a little secret, while most guys will never turn down the Pum Pum; all good men who really love a woman will wait to she is ready....and when he looks back at it, he will respect her even more. Don't allow yourself to be taken for granted, let boys come at you like the Princes that you all are with dignity and respect.

Ladies, May GOD continue to be your guide and protection---all the answers are in the book.

Mkris7

And this is why she will only dutty wine on a decent Rasta. Cause Rass is the most bess class of man u could be with. :lol:

[sapodila]

cause yuh like 'bakkanal' scorps! :lol:

I would do dat to Jenny... lift up de sofa an pelt it out wid em too.... :lol:

[Scorpio]

cause yuh like 'bakkanal' scorps! :lol:

I would do dat to Jenny... lift up de sofa an pelt it out wid em too.... :lol:

Saps, I just trying to show anotehr side of the story, and look at you, eh..adding to de bacchanal, want to throw de man out with de sofa...

I know a lot of decent women who settle down and happy with a decent man and neither one ah dem ent want nutten more than dat... :D

[sapodila]

Yuh Know! :lol:

[KFCSpicy]

I just love the way all yuh bandying about the word DECENT here. So only so called DECENT women and men deserve to be loved? B.S. Being loved is not an exclusive club. Is not Zen on white nights eh! Get with the programme.

[vaio]

nah.. bad gurls and boyz also need love....we cld spare some for them too.. ;)

[Scorpio]

^^Let them love each other qui.... ;)

[Jenny]

cause yuh like 'bakkanal' scorps! :lol:

I would do dat to Jenny... lift up de sofa an pelt it out wid em too.... :lol:

Saps, I just trying to show anotehr side of the story, and look at you, eh..adding to de bacchanal, want to throw de man out with de sofa...

I know a lot of decent women who settle down and happy with a decent man and neither one ah dem ent want nutten more than dat... :D

There is no other side to the story....the point is...he did something wrong...and in the heat of the moment I got upset and threw something at him...it just happened. Then again, if I had time and thought about it ...I would have done it the same way...