Cancer

[Lystra Kochin]

I think this blog (http://lilypie25.blogspot.com/2010/12/sopa.html)is by another lesbian with Cancer in Trinidad.

I would leave a comment but it is entitled Transition to an introvert... and like myself, going through this madness... you just need a quiet place to vent, without intrusion.

I read this and


(http://lilypie25.blogspot.com/2010/12/sopa.html)


So I got a bit of something to stay down just enough to digest..well most of it I hope. Watching the time tick-tock by and I can't wait to wash back my savior and hit the pillow. Yeah..I'm a work-a-holic no one in my condition would even consider being at work right now. But **** it..**** requires my attention and I'll be here barfing the acid out my stomach; let my boss send me home. Shoulder, back and head hurts too; feels like something always hurts on or in me. I should call this part "Story of My Life II" lol..yeah I'm laughing at this..sick isn't it? Yeah..I am. After a year of her bugging me to visit the doc..well maybe she'll be happy I did or not. She probably don't give a ****...oh well. Wonder if I'll be stuck in a room on a bed sapping up soup with a tough piece of loaf one day. Maybe she'll come visit me with her new femme and rub it in my face of all that I could've been...oh well. I'll have another sopa and see how it plays out.
(http://lilypie25.blogspot.com/2010/12/sopa.html)</H3>
And I want to shout... work can wait, if you drop dead which we are going to do, someone else will continue.. or it might die... who cares

[Lystra Kochin]

The other entry...



Mustered enough strength to attend Nyssa's Christmas Concert. She smiled and sang like the true angel she is but failed to mention that she had a lead role in one of the many acts...pumpkin played Rudolph :) She shook her wooshy bam bam and sang as the crowd of parents laughed and sang along in delight. Awww..my baby was so happy and I too, never mind the heat damn near melted my flesh. Nyssa was great along with all the other kids today. Smiling.


Makes me very sad, I don't have any kids... never reached around to it, thought I had time... and a uterus.. that wouldn't decided to get busy doing other things...

My mother died of cancer as well... but we don't have genetic data banks and don't do very good longitudinal studies..

Does Nyssa carry a gene, that because she may live her life exposed to the same environment.. mean she will meet her mother's fate.

Like I did mine ?

I wish we had an introduction to epidemiology certificate course .. if only to understand ... why me?

[Lystra Kochin]

http://www.sph.umich.edu/epid/GSS/courses/distance.html

I've been eyeing this for a while now.. maybe if I am alive next summer.

It is expensive... but maybe some other patients would like to sit in...

cancer doesn't discriminate... some very bright people are surcoming to this illness.

But whilst the neurones still firing, and because.. well, on ward we meet eachother, and know more case histories...

It probably sounds counter intuitive... but I think, we would make a good research team... as for pay...

I more need a sense of purpose.. understanding and a nurse or doctor.. closeby.

sounds so strange that I'm willing to continue working, on something important... with a sick bay and nurse in tow.

I miss hair... wasn't really attached to it.. before...

In comes the deputy..